Things Agent Clod can't do


 * 1) He cant call in any orbital airstrike.
 * 2) He must stay 60 feet away from any bomb
 * 3) Give him 2 pills every hour. from 6 am to 10 pm
 * 4) He must shower every 3 days [we do not want to clean the floor for 19 hours straight]
 * 5) Always keep an electric shock collar on him
 * 6) Don't let the shock collars controller fall into the hands of Agent Clod
 * 7) Don't let him message the Overwatch council memes about Anne Frank dying
 * 8) He cant say he is god or Satan or Hell incarnate or the giant rat god, not even as a joke
 * 9) He can't use any reality altering devices
 * 10) He can't use this as a to do list
 * 11) just because he can speak Hindi doesn't mean he should
 * 12) don't let him drink alcohol.
 * 13) don't let him light up a room with a flash bang
 * 14) we must not let him try any ways of stopping an entity by one of his ways
 * 15) The answer IS NOT SHOTGUNS, OR SHOTGUN FULLED RPG'S
 * 16) He can not be the coolest guy party if he isn't at the party
 * 17) deadly memetic's can not be given to mildly annoying employee's
 * 18) don't throw toasters at people who think that pizza bagels are not the best food. Just slap them on the wrist
 * 19) Do not throw jars of Jiffy peanut butter at the Lerker
 * 20) Do not give jar's of your mystery jelly to Harry Nebula [btw the mystery jelly is just a mix of Nutella, blubber from the blop, and almonds.
 * 21) Do not slice bits of jelly from Blop just because you want to make mystery jelly. it is a substance that tastes H O R R I B L E
 * 22) Don't let Agent Clod handle any firearm without supervision
 * 23) Don't make a real life light Saber
 * 24) He can't say F*CK ALIEN'S as a way to insult people with DOWN SYNDROME
 * 25) Mr Lanky isn't his brother in law
 * 26) Do not use reality altering devices to make your point right.
 * 27) Yes he is human... NOT DOG ALIEN MAN FROM THE YEAR 3000!!!
 * 28) Don't put [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] [REDACTED] (GOD DAMMIT)
 * 29) Okay grandpa is not a valid response to the Overwatch council giving orders to you
 * 30) Stop making jokes about 911 and telling them to new employees
 * 31) Just because your an Aussie doesn't mean you can say c*nt every 10 second
 * 32) He must wear work clothes even on casual Sunday
 * 33) Ivan the Ivodka drinka isn't real
 * 34) J.R.R Tolkien's real name isn't Jolkien Rolkien Rolkien Tolkien
 * 35) amazement juice isn't a mystery drink it is just orange juice dyed yellow
 * 36) vaccines don't cause you to breathe
 * 37) I CAN EdIT THIS F*CKERS [ NO YOU CANT YOU DUMB SH*T ]
 * 38) You can't just shoot a hole into the surface of mars
 * 39) he cant pour 5 kg of bleach down Harry nebula's throat because he has infinite lives
 * 40) POLAND IS A COUNTRY!!!
 * 41) FRAG LAND OF THE EPICS IS NOT A COUNTRY!!!
 * 42) don't answer paradox's. we don't want to wait for the universe to reform again.
 * 43) MIST GING RUNTER, is not a valid response to someone dying.
 * 44) The lerker isn't totally not hip hop yo]
 * 45) THE POLISH ARE POLE'S is not a proper response to someone talking about Europe
 * 46) Asia is not a country
 * 47) don't use our super computers to make map's for CS:GO
 * 48) He must not use any melee weapon ever... not even if the overwatch council say's so
 * 49) He may not sing his parody of the fresh prince of bel air theme
 * 50) he isn't a god, and he can't say he is, not even in a joke.
 * 51) he can't try to tame the Lerker with cigar and a match of COD
 * 52) he can't time travel without supervision, private Manngreen is not a good person to supervise people.
 * 53) he can't replace anyone's water with these: vodka, p*ss, AMAZEMENT JUICE, blood, liquid nitrogen, or acid of any kind
 * 54) he can't throw bone's at people
 * 55) he can't make any musical instrument out of any entity's